The first thing you need to do in this situation is to understand and believe that you ARE ENOUGH. You're not defined by your value to any other person on the face of this Earth. So, if you find yourself thinking "I'm not good enough for them," you're incorrect. Sometimes two people are just not a good fit for each other. That doesn't mean one person is better than the other. Everyone is born with an inherent worth and is deserving of love and respect. (Better Health Editorial Team, 2022) Someone else may be trying to make you feel that you are not good enough. Or you may be suffering from low self-esteem. Maybe you’re depressed. The key is to identify why you feel this way and work to improve your self-image. How to Reprogram Your Mind to Build Low Self-Esteem The mind is an activity and not a thing. It’s the language of your thought processes that is revealed through your action. To create a change in your self-image is through repetition of words, focus, and discipline. These mind activating ingredients apply to weight loss, a healthy lifestyle, love and financial success. Prior to embarking on changing the negative patterns that are embedded in your subconscious mind, ask yourself the following questions to bring clarity to what you are seeking:
Maybe you feel like you are not good enough for your girlfriend or boyfriend, or even your friends. Do you think they are better than you and you don’t deserve to have them as friends? If that is the case, remember this: No human being is ever ‘too good’ for another. The next time we get together, we will look at why we might think others are better than we are and ways to overcome those irrational beliefs. References
Better Health Editorial Team. (2022, October 4). Help Me: When You’re Feeling Not Good Enough For Them. Retrieved from betterhelp.com: https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/personality-disorders/help-me-when-youre-feeling-im-not-good-enough/ Pullman, A. (2019). How to Reprogram Your Mind to Build Low Self-Esteem. In A. Pullman, Self Esteem and Your Unique Style of Fit (pp. 13-14). Annadale, Virginia: Independently Published.
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Just because you say, “I am Enough” does that mean you are done? You don’t need to learn more, do more, have been measured and judged as being finished? No. What it means is the you that you are today, right now, at this minute, is enough. It does not mean that you are everything. It does not mean that you never make mistakes. It means you understand how you fit in the world. It means it is easier to admit your weaknesses and understand that you don’t have to hide who you are. Hiding your mistakes and weaknesses is the same as saying, “I am NOT enough.” (Wilkins, 2017) As you continue to hide behind what you think everyone want to see about who you are, the more your mind will begin do what it thinks you want it to do. For example, if you spend your time thinking about negative aspects of your life, your mind will react to those negative aspects and depression can set in. Being critical of yourself is one of the major causes of depression. (Annabel, 2022) It is time to make the unfamiliar more familiar. Instead of saying, “I am old, therefore I am becoming more forgetful. I must have Alzheimer’s disease,” try saying, “There are so many things I can do to keep my mind active as I grow older.” Then do those things. You are enough – you can remember a lot of things, and you can continue to build rather than destroy memories. Seven things to remember when you think you are not enough:
You are enough just as you are. And self-love will be a little bit easier every time you remind yourself of that. (Sonnier, 2023) References
Annabel. (2022, May 19). Inspiring Tips. Retrieved from Marisa Peer Tells Us To Say 'I am Enough': https://inspiringtips.com/marisa-peer-tells-us-to-say-i-am-enough/ Sonnier, M. (2023). 7 Things to Remember When You Think You're Not Good Enough. Retrieved from tiny buddha: https://tinybuddha.com/blog/7-things-to-remember-when-you-think-youre-not-good-enough/ Wilkins, M. C. (2017). What it Means to be Enough. Retrieved from melissacamarawilkins.com: https://melissacamarawilkins.com/what-it-means-to-be-enough/ This year’s blog topic is: I am Enough! Together we will explore what it means to know that we are enough. If you are wondering how we can tell if we don’t think we are enough, consider these signs that you may have some inner work to do because you don’t think you are enough:
According to Laura Murphy, on the SoulBody website, our belief of not being enough comes from a collection of moments in our lives. Things said or unsaid by others, even in jest, that make love and approval seem like a transaction. For example, If you act this way, you will be rewarded or shown love and adoration. I think it grows and feeds off of relationships marked with imbalance, where we give away our power and worth for the promise of love, trust, and commitment from the other. Just to name a few ways. It shows up as overachieving, comparison, procrastination, avoidance, not finishing what we started, fear, obstacles, challenges, self-sabotage, overwhelm, and on and on. The fear of not being enough is a bottom feeder and the ego will work hard to get what it wants. It preys on our dreams, ambitions, relationships, health, and happiness. (Murphy, 2022) Over the next 12 months, every other Sunday, we will explore this concept of being enough. References
Emma. (2022). The Meaning of I am Enough and Why it is so Important. Retrieved from Our Mindful Life: https://www.ourmindfullife.com/i-am-enough-meaning/ Murphy, L. (2022). I am Enough (And so are You). Retrieved from SoulBody: https://www.soulbody.co/blog/i-am-enough |
AuthorI am a Performance Enhancement Specialist with a background in Emergency Psychiatric Medicine and Community Addiction. Archives
December 2023
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